


Dig me up a grave

by zation



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Also little scared Dean, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angrier Sam, Angry Mary, Bottom Dean, But also calm Sam, Canon Compliant, Case Fic, Dark fic, Dean gets raped, Dean/OMC - Freeform, Embarrassed Dean, Explicit flashback, Hurt Dean Winchester, M/M, Maybe it's the demon blood in Sammy that makes him do it?, Minor spoilers for season 12, OMC is a fucking douche, Or karma, Past Rape/Non-con, Prompt Fic, Rape, Rape/Non-con Elements, Read the summary it's pretty spot on, There's nothing pretty about it, face your fears, oblivious characters, read with caution
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-28
Updated: 2017-09-28
Packaged: 2019-01-06 11:09:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12210060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zation/pseuds/zation
Summary: Original prompt:I really want to see a fic where Sam, Dean, and Mary end up working with this hunter on a case. And Dean is acting weird. And they find out at some point that it's because this hunter used to work with John too and had raped Dean either when he was a teenager or when Sam was at Stanford. I just basically want to see how Sam and Mary react to figuring this out. That's what I'm looking forward toOr,The one where karma is a bitch.





	Dig me up a grave

**Author's Note:**

> Set roughly between The Raid (12.14) and Somewhere Between Heaven and Hell (12.15)
> 
> This one is rough, you guys. There will be no romanticization of rape here, please heed the tags and read with caution. The rape part is included but if you don't want to read it (and you don't have to for the plot) you can skip the part in _italics_.
> 
> Thank you, BeeCas, for being my queen and thank you, patient prompter who waited absolutely too goddamn long for this <3
> 
> (Title from Nickleback’s [Follow you home](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aprb1io0uHg))

 

 

 

The drive from the Bunker to Richfield, Utah, is roughly 13 hours so Dean makes the decision to stop in Silverthorne, Colorado. They’re meeting up with mom anyway and she’s coming down from Douglas, Wyoming so it makes sense to stop in the middle.

There’s a Luxury Inn smack dab in Silverthorne and Dean books two rooms even though mom hasn’t arrived yet. They get some take-out from a diner and eat it in the room while Sam pours over the information provided by the Bunker’s library.

The food is a little too greasy, even for Dean’s tastes, and he’s glad they ate in because he can feel his stomach rumbling unpleasantly even before he’s finished. Dean hates getting older. He stretches out his bad knee, which of course takes that moment to twinge painfully, and grimaces at nothing and everything.

Outside the sky is a slate grey and Dean watches the clouds move, figures they’re gonna be driving through rain tomorrow.

”So,” he says after a while because he can’t take the silence. There’s been a lot of silence since that whole shitstorm at the British Men of Letters with the Alpha Vampire and that’s probably mostly his fault. ”Basilisk, huh?”

”Yeah.” Sam answers and sounds a little too cheerful for the topic. ”And get this, it’s not like in the _Harry Potter_ movies at all.”

Dean rolls his eyes. ”Good because I don’t know jack squat about that.”

Sam makes his most unimpressed face and Dean wonders if his sneaky little brother has found the books he hides beneath his bed. He keeps them as a memory of Charlie and hasn’t been reading them at all.

”In _Harry Potter_ the basilisk is a giant snake-like creature.” Sam continues and Dean nods slowly. ”And in _Dungeons &Dragons_ it’s a giant eight-footed lizard. Both are common ways to describe it and I thought something like that was what we were going to find here as well.”

”But it’s not?” Dean’s knee pops. It’s not audible but he can feel it against his thumb and then it feels better.

”Well, according to what that hunter mom talked to said there hasn’t really been any sightings of anything that big and the Men of Letters material we have on it suggests it’s gonna be smaller. Listen.” He angles back the screen on his laptop and starts reading. ”‘The Basilisk is a small snake, being no more than twelve fingers in length’.” He looks up at Dean with an excitement that Dean didn’t know he had missed seeing on his little brother’s face.

”Twelve fingers?” Dean snorts and stands up to start gathering the trash from their dinner. His stomach rumbles again and he smothers a burp. ”I can stomp that to death.”

”Don’t underestimate it.” Sam says with a furrow on his brow. ”According to this it leaves a deadly trail of venom and the ground around its nest is scorched by its presence. Plus mom said her hunter contact reported people’s inner organs turning to stone.”

Dean goes to his bed and starts unbuttoning his shirt. He needs a shower and then some sleep if they’re going to be driving all day tomorrow too. Perhaps a Peptol.

”That can’t be true.”

”No.” Sam turns back to his laptop. ”But I’m thinking the venom can calcify organs, perhaps? That would be kind of consistent with the Basilisk lore.”

”Well, if it scorches the ground around its evil lair it shouldn’t be too hard to find, do they have a weakness?”

Sam sighs. ”Weasel odor.”

”Great.” Dean isn’t surprised at this point. ”I’m not even going to question that, it’s too dumb to make up.” He walks over to the bathroom, pausing with his hand on the doorknob. ”How come this hunter even needs our help? We have other stuff to do and I mean, twelve fingers long, nest easily recognizable, defeated by AXE Weasel Spray, how the fuck hard can it be?”

Sam actually squirms a little in his seat, which is quite the sight considering his size. Dean raises an eyebrow.

”They’re flock creatures.” Sam mumbles eventually. ”Like, flocks of twenty, thirty. And they’re poisonous to the touch.”

Dean heaves a big sigh. ”Poison _and_ venom? Remind me to pick up radiation suits tomorrow.” He shakes his head. ”That guy really stepped in a shithole, didn’t he? Who is he anyway?”

Sam looks up from his laptop and frowns in confusion for a moment. ”Mom called him Burt, said we’d talk more when she gets here but it sounded kind of like we should know him. Do we know a Burt?”

Dean’s throat feels too tight and he knows it looks shifty when he looks away. _He_ knows a Burt. ”Not that I remember. Kinda common name, though. We’ll see.”

Sam nods but Dean barely sees it because his vision is going fuzzy. He actually locks the bathroom door and hopes Sam thinks that’s because he’s going to jerk off. It’s not.

He looks in the mirror over the sink and wills himself to calm down because it’s probably another guy named Burt. They’ve met many Burts through the years and Dean hates how he kind of always reacts to the name but it’s never been _him_. The good old US of A is after all very big and the chances are low.

”It’s not him.” Dean tells his reflection and he’s satisfied with how well he believes that all throughout the evening.

The hunter’s name or origin or link to them doesn’t even come up when mom joins them because she got held up by an accident just outside of Cheyenne and got to Silverthorne so late there wasn’t much else to do but go to bed.

They will probably talk in the morning, though, and Dean kind of doesn’t want to because he doesn’t want to know. He wishes they were back in the Bunker and trying to figure out what to do about the British Men of Letters and Kelly Kline. He’s sorely tempted to call Cas just to see how his hunt for Kelly is going but ends up not doing it because it’s pointless. Cas will call on his own when he’s got something, that’s how it’s always been.

 

*****

 

_Dean’s whole body hurt despite the amount of Aspirin he downed before dropping into bed. He knew fighting werewolves was tough shit but this was probably the most beaten he had ever been. He had just been lucky that he and dad had teamed up with that Burt guy or Dean would have been dead by now. Dad had said that he didn’t have any broken ribs but it sure as fuck felt like it._

_Dad and Burt were out right now, celebrating the win and Dean was bitter about being left behind but it wasn’t as if he could have joined them, not looking and feeling like this. But fuck, getting a beer would have been nice._

_He dragged himself out of bed when he had been lying awake for exactly two hours, listening to all the familiar sounds that came with shitty motels like this one. He knew dad would be angry about Dean sneaking from his whisky but hey, maybe he could blame it on the injuries and dad would be soft on him just this once?_

_Drinking alone was depressing though and he entertained ideas of calling Sammy but the kid had made it pretty clear that he didn’t want to spend time with him and dad and besides, with the time difference Sam was probably still at some cram school like a good little Stanford student._

_Dean snorted and took a big swig of the whisky. It burned but the ache was good compared to his battered body. Damn, he felt like his whole right cheek was swollen and he could barely open his right eye. Great, now driving would be a bitch._

_He fell asleep at some point but snorted awake not much later when his bladder demanded it. Looking at the time he saw that it was well past midnight and dad still wasn’t back. He checked his phone when he got back from the bathroom just to be sure but he wasn’t really expecting anything. Dad was usually like this between hunts and even though Dean was bitter that he was the only one battered from this hunt he was at least kind of glad to be out of Burt’s company._

_Sure, Burt had kind of saved him from being werewolf chomp but the guy was weird. Kind of sleazy. This was the second time they worked with him in only three months and yeah, he was a good hunter and all, but Dean didn’t like the way Burt looked at some people. Like they were meat, kind of._

_The whisky had made his body a little looser and Dean felt the ache in his muscles and the bruises a little less. He felt sluggish, though, and immediately went back to bed. He had just flopped down on his stomach when the door rattled as someone knocked on it._

_”Get the goddamn key, dad.” Dean muttered and refused for a moment to get up but a second knock rattled the door even more and Dean didn’t want the neighbors to complain so he dragged himself out of bed again, groaning petulantly. ”I’m the injured one.” He growled when he opened the door but that wasn’t dad._

_”Yes.” Burt grinned down at him. ”And I wanted to check up on you.”_

_”Okay.” Dean said slowly, casting quick glances over Burt’s shoulder to see if dad was with him. ”That’s nice, I guess.”_

_”Isn’t it?” Burt’s grin widened and Dean could smell the alcohol on him. Rum, most likely. Dean wrinkled his nose at the smell. Burt smelled kind of bad in general, like stale sweat and gun oil, and the rum didn’t make it better. ”Aren’t you going to let me in, boy?”_

_Dean hobbled to the side. ”I suppose.” He muttered. ”Where’s dad?”_

_”John?” Burt asked unnecessarily. He shrugged off his shaggy coat and tossed it on dad’s bed. ”He’s got himself a little tart to entertain him. Didn’t want you to be lonely, though.”_

_Dean frowned and closed the door. Dad with a woman? Well, he supposed it happened because dad was a free man after all. It was just… well, Dean had never heard about it before was all._

_”I can sleep fine on my own, Burt. I don’t need a babysitter.”_

_Burt laughed his grating laugh and Dean went to sit on his own bed, his body too tired to keep standing even though he kind of wanted to._

_”I know that, boy.”_

_If he knew so well then he ought to stop calling Dean ‘boy’, Dean thought sourly. There were no lights turned on in the room but there was light coming in from between the curtains where the motel’s neon sign hung just outside their room. It backlit Burt and made his face hard to make out. Suddenly Dean wanted to turn on the bedside lamp but thought Burt would mock him if he did._

_”So are you gonna sleep in dad’s bed? You kinda woke me up.” It was of course a lie but Dean was very tired. Whisky, Aspirin, and a rough beating would do that to you._

_Burt sat still and silent for a moment, seemingly just regarding Dean and Dean felt naked in only his sleeping tee and boxer-briefs. Fucking asshole staring like a creeper._

_”Now that wouldn’t be fair to your old man, would it?” Burt said eventually, his voice raspy._

_Dean frowned at the abrupt change in the other man’s tone. ”What?”_

_Burt rose to his feet, almost looming over Dean. ”Where’re your dad gonna sleep? You want him to be on the floor?”_

_Dean was confused and a little pissed off. Burt was the one who was in the wrong fucking room to begin with._

_”I didn’t say that.” He started angrily and tried to stand up but Burt put a hand on his shoulder and easily pushed him down again. Pain flared up in Dean’s side and he gasped in surprise. ”The fuck, man?”_

_”Yes, exactly.” Burt mumbled. ”Fuck.”_

_In the next moment Dean found himself pushed back on the bed and Burt was forcing his legs apart. Bile rose in Dean’s throat and he kicked out, connecting with Burt’s side and making the older man grunt._

_”What the fucking hell?!” Dean shouted and made to get out of the way but was unprepared for Burt’s mean right hook. He fell back on the bed again, his vision swimming a little from the blow._

_”You be a good boy and stay still now.” Burt growled and climbed on top of Dean. ”I saved you and I want my reward, but don’t think I ain’t above roughening you up. Ain’t no one gonna notice an extra bruise here or there.”_

_Dean gritted his teeth and punched at Burt but the angle was bad because he was lying down and Burt had the high ground. He slapped Dean’s hand away and punched Dean again, this time connecting with Dean’s hurt side and the pain that spread white-hot through his body made him whimper pitifully._

_”Pretty sounds from a pretty mouth, boy.” Burt grinned and grabbed Dean roughly to flip him to his stomach. ”Now you stay put and give me my due.”_

_Dean could taste blood in his mouth and figured he must have bitten himself. The blood made him think clearer, however, and while Burt busied himself with opening his belt Dean reached for the gun he kept under his pillow._

_But of course he was too slow, or else Burt was too alert despite his drinking. Either way, Burt saw him before Dean had flipped the safety and they struggled for the gun for a moment before Burt wrestled it out of Dean’s grip and promptly clocked him on the head with the handle._

_It made Dean kind of pass out for a moment. Not really, but everything became blurry and he had a hard time breathing. He could feel Burt doing things with his body and he tried to move away but he was only half awake._

_He flew into consciousness fast enough when Burt yanked down his boxer-briefs to squeeze his soft dick and balls._

_”Get the fuck off!” he shouted but it came out too garbled for his liking and Burt just grinned at him._

_”Even down ‘ere you’re pretty. You musta gotten all your mommy’s genes ‘cause your dad’s ugly as shit.”_

_”I’ll fucking gut you.” Dean spat and tried kicking again but Burt was quicker, flipping Dean over to his stomach again and it was only then that Dean noticed that his hands were tied together and fastened to the headboard with what looked like Burt’s belt._

_”Easy now, tiger.” Burt mumbled and draped himself over Dean’s back, rutting his cock against Dean’s ass and fucking fuck, he was rock hard._

_Dean’s throat closed up and he bucked back, trying his hardest to throw the bigger man off but Burt was heavy and he only seemed to enjoy it when Dean moved._

_”When dad gets back you’re gonna be in for a world of pain.” Dean wheezed, unable to breathe properly with Burt’s weight on him and his whole body screaming in pain._

_”Yeah?” Burt panted against Dean’s ear, his breath hot and disgusting but Dean couldn’t move far enough away. ”You gonna tell him about taking it up the ass? Think he’s gonna like to hear how his precious little soldier is nothing but a crying, pillow-biting pansy?”_

_”I’m not crying.” Dean hissed._

_Suddenly most of Burt’s weight lifted off him and Dean felt Burt gripping his hips harshly, grinding his hard dick in Dean’s ass crack._

_”I ain’t finished yet, boy.” He growled and spat right down at Dean’s exposed ass, massaging in his spit with his thumb and pressing in so he could stretch out Dean’s hole to spit in there as well._

_Dean felt paralyzed. He knew he should fight back even more now but his body hurt too much, his mind was a jumble with emotions and when Burt forced himself inside Dean really started crying. Not loudly but in big silent sobs that wracked his body and seemed to spur Burt on._

_It went on for fucking ever. Burt panted and groaned, slapping Dean’s ass once in a while as he fucked Dean raw. It stung like something had ruptured and Dean didn’t know if he was going to throw up or shit himself when Burt would finally pull out completely._

_He gagged at the thought and heard Burt laugh at him._

_”Goddamn you’re tight.” Burt grunted. ”Fucking virgin, you gonna puke? Your hole feels amazing but you’re disgusting, Dean.” Burt laughed when Dean gasped for air as another sob shuddered through him. ”I knew I said you were gonna cry but fucking hell, take it like a man.”_

_It hurt. It hurt, it hurt, it_ hurt _._

_Dean’s already beaten body shuddered and spasmed as Burt fucked him harder, going even deeper. His stomach turned and he threw up a little in his mouth but managed to swallow it down. Burt’s fingers were digging in at his hips, probably leaving bruises but he was right, no one would notice them in the sea of black and blue that already mottled Dean’s sides._

_When Burt eventually finished he did so inside Dean and Dean was so disgusted by it that he started crying even more._

_”Damn you’re unattractive.” Burt muttered and untied Dean’s hands to take his belt back. ”Clean yourself up, will you? Don’t wanna let daddy find you being a little bitch, right?”_

_As fucked up as that was he was right. Dean never wanted to disappoint dad and it was that thought that made him drag himself out of bed and into the bathroom to shower quickly. There was blood on his thighs because of course there was. He barely made it to the toilet before he threw up and he spent most of that night curled into a little ball on the lumpy armchair in the corner by the TV._

_When dad returned in the morning Burt had already left the motel and Dean was packing his duffle. Dad seemed surprised but otherwise rolled with it. And as expected, there were no questions about his bruises or the dark rings under his eyes. Nightmares after a werewolf hunt were after all to be expected._

_Dean had never felt so worthless._

 

 

Dean spends most of his night thinking about that old memory and when the morning comes he feels stupid because he wasted much needed sleep thinking about something that most likely will turn out to be irrelevant. Because lots of guys are named Burt and 99.999% of them are good guys.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Because of a late start they don’t get to Richfield, Utah, until around three in the afternoon. Dean has seemed gloomy and tired the whole day, though, so Sam decides not to mention how long this trip took them or the fact that a drive of this length would have been done in one stretch just a couple of years back.

Dean is distracted as they pull into the parking lot at Nights Inn and he ends up parking crooked, which makes Sam raise his eyebrow at him. Instead of saying anything Dean just sighs and switches off the ignition.

Momentarily, Sam is struck with the thought that maybe Dean knows they’re here under the orders of the British Men of Letters. He’s been working together with mom and the British organization for almost a week now and he feels bad for not telling Dean. But Dean has a history of overreacting and he knows his big brother already feels betrayed by mom’s choice.

And when he looks at this objectively he also knows that it sounds strange how that Burt guy just suddenly contacted mom and how Sam already knows basically everything about their monster adversary. He should just tell Dean.

The moment passes, however, and Dean gets out of the Impala to talk to mom when she gets out of her own car in the parking space besides theirs. Sam kind of wishes Cas was there because he wants to talk to someone about Dean’s weird gloominess and mom doesn’t really know them well enough to tell much of a difference.

He sighs to himself and exits the car just as an older man walks up to mom and Dean.

”Well, if it ain’t wee little Dean Winchester.” The man says in a drawl and both mom and Sam frown at him while Dean oddly enough just kind of hunches in on himself. ”You grew up big.”

”I did.” Dean spits, making Sam raise his eyebrows. ”I’m all grown up now and you’d do well to remember that, Burt.”

”Oh, so you do know each other?” mom asks innocently and smiles at the shaggy man. Burt just kind of grins at Dean before turning to mom.

”Sure do.” He announces happily. ”Me ‘n John went on a couple of hunts together. It must have been, what Dean? Fifteen years ago?”

So round about the time when Sam was in Stanford, no wonder he doesn’t remember meeting this Burt character. Though he does wonder why Dean’s never mentioned him.

”Thereabout.” Dean mutters and puts his hands in the pockets on his jacket. ”So what’s all this hubbub about you not being able to kill a little snake, _Burt_? You growing weak?”

”Dean, don’t be rude.” Mom exclaims but Burt just kind of stares at Dean, meeting his challenging stare with an oddly mocking grin.

Mom proceeds with excusing Dean’s behavior but Sam knows his brother better than that. Sure, Dean can be abrasive if he’s in that mood but something’s wrong here and Sam can only hope it won’t affect how they work together on this hunt.

”We should discuss this in my room.” Burt says and gestures to the inn behind him. ”You should get one quick too, apparently there’s some conference or some shit in town.”

Sam sighs because of course there is a conference when there’s a venomous snake nest brewing in the National Forest just beside the town.

 

 

They only manage to get one room because of the conference but Sam thinks that’s fine, doesn’t understand why Dean turns all huffy when he offers himself to stay with Burt.

”You ain’t sleeping in his room, Sammy.” Dean hisses on their way over to their room. Sam only frowns but mom looks irritated.

”What’s up with you, Dean?” she asks with a frown. ”We’re here to work together.”

”Doesn’t mean we have to bunk with the man.”

”Of course not, Dean.” Sam says amiably, having heard that tone many times before. ”But there’s only two beds in the rooms, we’re one short and Burt’s got one extra. See where I’m going?”

”There’s a couch in our room, I asked and the receptionist said there was.”

Sam frowns but it’s more in confusion than irritation. ”Are you suggesting I sleep on a couch when there’s a bed just a few doors down?”

Dean throws up his hands. ” _I’ll_ sleep on the couch. So long as we’re together.” He stomps off to the Impala, presumably to get the duffle bags and Sam is left with mom.

”He’s really stubborn.” Mom comments and Sam sighs before starting walking again. ”I think he gets that from me.”

”Look, mom…” Sam doesn’t know what to say. It’s at moments like these that he’s painfully aware of the fact that the woman he calls ‘mom’ doesn’t really know either of them. Anyone who knows Dean can clearly see that he’s upset over something and not just being a control freak ass. ”I think he just wants the family together as much as he can. Dean is very protective and a lot of stuff has happened, right? We almost died last week and he couldn’t do anything about that, usually things like that take him some time to get over.”

Mom nods slowly and seems to accept that explanation. And while it’s a good explanation, and highly plausible, Sam doesn’t believe a word he just said.

 

*****

 

Several hours later it’s painfully clear to Sam that Dean hates Burt and that this is not going to work out. What’s worse is that Burt seems to know that Dean doesn’t like him and he seems to thrive on it. He makes kind of jerk comments that set Dean off and sure, Sam doesn’t know what or if something has happened in the past but he can definitely see why Burt is unlikable in general. He can’t wait to get this hunt over with and then hopefully never see Burt again.

Thankfully they work through their information swiftly and it turns out that the British Men of Letters has basically done everything for them. The only reason why the three of them have been called in is because the nest is so massive and the Basilisks tend to get angry when sprayed with weasel odor, which, fair enough.

What makes Sam irritated isn’t that Burt has already gotten the spray from the Men of Letters because that actually makes their job easier. How they would have extracted that odor was beyond Sam but now he doesn’t have to worry and that’s nice. What does irritate him is how Burt makes fun of Dean for not knowing or understanding how or where the odor came from.

Mom said she had warned Burt not to mention the British Men of Letters to Dean and fair enough, he doesn’t. But he’s still an ass about Dean’s ignorance and Sam can tell that it’s getting to his big brother and he doesn’t like Dean looking dejected like this because Dean isn’t stupid but he tends to think he is and Sam knows stuff like this is really grating on his self-esteem.

The kicker comes when they eventually trek out into Fishlake National Forest to find the nest. The British Men of Letters have already given Burt the coordinates but he hasn’t been out there yet so they kind of stumble into it and boy is it big.

Some fifty Basilisks turn a collective glare up at them, their eyes glowing in the shady dusk and the forest seems to rise around them, looming over them as all four of them realize that maybe this wouldn’t be as easy as they had thought.

The absolute worse is that while the weasel odor spray does seem to make them groggy it also indeed makes them extremely angry. Sam and Dean realize this immediately but Burt keeps on spraying for a while and when mom goes over to stop him a Basilisk jumps at her.

Dean howls at her to get out of the way but has to bat the snake-like lizard off her shoulder with his spray can. Sure, they’re small like the lore said but they seem to have feet with sharp claws all along their slithering bodies and it tears into mom’s jacket before Dean gets it off.

”Fucking shit.” Dean roars. ”Burt, stop being an ass you goddamn idiot.”

Burt stops to stare sullenly at Dean but he realizes just what kind of danger they’re in the moment he pauses his spraying. He makes big eyes and then they’re all just running for their lives. Fire is the first thing that comes to Sam’s mind to extinguish these fuckers but he would rather not set a fire in the middle of the forest. And the weasel odor lore can’t be _that_ wrong, he needs to read up on this more because for all their posturing the British Men of Letters tend to forget about field experience.

They make it a fair distance away before they start slowing down and it seems like the spray made the Basilisks groggy enough to not pursue them for long. Sam doesn’t want to take any chances, though, and they all keep going at a fast pace.

At some point Dean trips over a hidden stone and Burt catches him before he stumbles right into a tree. He gets one hand on Dean’s chest and another around Dean’s left upper arm but Dean shoves him off so fast they both almost trip anyway.

”Get the fuck off.” Dean growls and to his surprise Sam sees Burt grin at Dean. ”I mean it, I got lotsa more weapons than a single gun this time.”

Sam turns to the pair, strangely happy that mom hasn’t noticed the commotion and is still walking ahead of them.

”Not much use if you can’t use ‘em, boy.” Burt smirks and Dean gets up in the man’s face, hisses something so low that Sam can’t hear it and then stomps off, leaving Burt looking a little nervous.

The interaction sticks with Sam and when they’re back in their room he’s happy that mom offers to go out to buy food because he can’t really let this slip any longer and Dean is hard enough to talk to when it’s just the two of them.

”I say we salt and burn ‘em.” Dean says as he’s untying his shoes. ”And we should get some kind of protection suits, mom almost got bitten and you said they were poisonous.”

The topic is of course important because people are still dying in this town but Sam barely hears Dean’s words. He sits down on the coffee table in front of the couch Dean slept on and where Dean is sitting now.

”Dean, what’s going on with Burt?”

Dean frowns down at his does. ”That he kept spraying you mean? I dunno, he’s kind of an idiot so that’s probably why.”

Sam sighs. ”When he prevented you from head-butting that tree you shoved him off.” He narrows his eyes when he sees Dean stiffen. ”I know you’re a macho guy, Dean, but you’re not adverse to men touching you. Cas touches you all the time and you don’t shove him off.”

Dean makes a face. ”That’s because he gets this kind of kicked puppy look when I tell him not to.”

”And you don’t want him to look like that because he’s your best friend, I get it.” Sam leans forward and calls it a success when all Dean does is look away. ”And in contrast, Burt is not a friend at all but shit Dean, you’ve been at the guy’s throat this whole time.”

”I just don’t think he’s a good guy ‘s all.” Dean mutters. ”And I don’t have to explain myself to you, Sam, you’ve seen what kind of a douche he is.”

”Of course you don’t.” Sam frowns and is acutely aware that Dean is actually still sitting on the couch instead of storming off. ”I just wanna know if everything’s alright. I don’t want anyone of us getting killed because you don’t like Burt touching you.”

Dean cringes and folds his arms over his chest, almost as if hiding and the image settles badly with Sam.

”It’s not gonna be a problem.”

Little tidbits of the day filter through Sam’s mind. Burt noting how big Dean is now, Burt making an indecent comment about one of the victims and the way she dressed, Dean flinching away from Burt’s touches.

”Dean? Did Burt at some point touch you? Like, badly?” it’s a weird conclusion to come to, right? Weird and not very likely. More likely is that Burt and dad didn’t get along or maybe that Burt got dad and Dean stuck in a dangerous mess. Why did Sam even jump to this conclusion?

But Dean slides down the couch and actually closes his legs slowly.

”It’s nothing.”

”Did you sleep with him?” Sam’s heart is hammering because this feels unreal. ”He doesn’t seem like your type, being a man and all, but it’s cool if… if that’s how it is.”

”Jesus fucking Christ, Sam.” Dean exclaims and his anger actually calms Sam down a bit. Dean is usually kind of defensive about his sexuality, despite obviously having a crush on Dr. Sexy MD, so this seems like an appropriate reaction. ”You think I slept with that old geezer and I’m regretting my decision now that I see him again? Fucking hell.”

”Well, I don’t know what I’m supposed to think.” Sam counters huffily. ”You act all weird and won’t talk about it, which doesn’t surprise me. But with everything that’s going on right now I have to know that you’re okay. And it’s fine with me, by the way, if you’re—”

”Don’t you fucking say it, Sam.” Dean growls but he looks shaky. ”Don’t you call me gay because of what that fucker did to me.”

The air around them feels thick and cloying.

”Did to you?” Sam eventually asks in a low tone. ”What did he do?”

Dean gets up and stalks to the other side of the room only to stalk right back.

”I was hurt, okay? No way I would’ve let him do that to me if I could have… could have stopped…” he looks up, his eyes practically pleading in a way they haven’t done in a long time and Sam’s stomach roils unpleasantly. ”I tried to kick him off, I fucking swear. I had my gun too but I’d been mauled by werewolves and I was jacked up on pain meds and whisky so I was slow. I did—I _tried_ , okay?”

Sam feels like his breath is stuck in his throat and his movements are jerky when he stands up slowly.

”Burt _raped_ you?”

It’s of course part of their cosmic bad luck that mom just happens to enter the room in the exact moment that Sam says that. She shuts the door quickly behind herself and looks at them with big eyes even as Sam curses his luck because hell if Dean is going to talk now.

”What are you talking about?” mom demands and Sam can see Dean shutting off as easily as if he had shut a door in their faces.

”Dean…” he starts but Dean bullies past him to get to the door.

”It was nothing, it’s old news.”

”Dean.” He gets a grip on Dean’s arm and can feel the muscles playing there but thankfully enough Dean stays put, even if he won’t look at Sam. ”Whatever Burt did, it’s not your fault, okay?”

”Goddamnit, Sam.” Dean rips himself free and stares Sam down. ”This ain’t some after school special. I know what happened and I know it’s not my fault. I’m telling you, it’s over.”

Sam can see it written plainly on Dean’s face that he doesn’t believe a word he’s saying but before Sam can stop him Dean has already disappeared out the door. From experience he knows Dean responds horribly to being chased down so instead he just goes to sit on the couch, sighing deeply because what the hell?

”Sam.” Mom says then and Sam forces himself to look at her. ”What’s going on?”

It’s not his thing to tell but he supposes she already knows enough of it. And if they had been a normal family they would have gone to their mom to talk about things like this. Then again, in a normal family Dean wouldn’t have been attacked by a werewolf and then raped. Fucking _raped_.

”It seems that sometime during the hunts Burt worked with Dean and dad he, um, he forced himself on Dean.”

Mom looks positively livid. ”And we’re _not_ ripping Burt a new one?”

Sam’s stomach knots itself when he thinks of what Dean must have been going through not just today but every day. He’s always thought Dean was strong but holy shit. So much crap always happens to his big brother and yet Dean is always more concerned with Sam’s well-being than his own. And somehow, with everything that’s happened to Dean through the years, Sam feels like this intimate violation may be the worst. Silently he wonders how many more instances like this have happened. How many more Burts have there been in Dean’s life that Dean just won’t talk about?

”You don’t know Dean.” He says in a low voice and hates how sad he’s making her. Hates even more that he thinks it’s at least a bit appropriate because yes, suddenly being resurrected must have been hard for her but she _left_ them. ”This must be up to him. I’ll talk to him tomorrow.”

Mom eyes the door as if she’s tempted to go after Dean. ”Is he okay?”

”No.” Sam answers truthfully and pushes off the couch to go and change his clothes, his appetite gone now. ”But he’s hard to talk to, you’ll learn.”

”Should… should we call Castiel? Dean talks about him as if you boys are very close to him, maybe he could help?”

Sam thinks about what talking would do, thinks about Dean’s usual aversion to talking things out. Also thinks a bit about what Burt would look like if Cas took the time to smite him and feels sickeningly satisfied with the image.

”That should be up to Dean too. He’s carried this with him, I doubt he ever would have said anything if it hadn’t been for Burt showing up.” Or even then. For the first time in a long time Sam regrets being nosy.

”That’s not right.” Mom says heatedly. ”And now he’s probably out drinking, what if Burt assaults him again?”

Sam shakes his head. ”For Burt’s sake I hope he doesn’t.”

 

*****

 

Dean is of course in an extremely bad mood the next morning and it kind of gets worse when he and mom get in an argument over what had happened and why Dean hadn’t told dad about it.

”Are you insane?” Dean hollers when mom suggests that. ”Do you even know your own husband?” he shuts himself in the bathroom, presumably to calm down but Sam also suspects he feels bad about mom’s shocked face and doesn’t want to see it.

Sam rolls out of his bed, sighing and rubbing a hand through his hair.

”What does he mean?” mom almost whispers when they hear the shower turn on.

Sam sighs again. ”You have to understand how fast Dean had to grow up. He had to take care of me, mom, and he had to be dad’s good little soldier. It chipped off his self-esteem, little by little.”

He’s been thinking all night about what to do about this and the only conclusion he’s come to is that he can’t let it slip. Can’t let Burt just walk away from here smirking. But he also can’t force Dean to do something.

Mom sits in silence throughout Dean’s shower while Sam double checks that they’ve got everything they need for their new plan to eliminate the Basilisks. Sure, blowtorches in a forest is a bad idea but at this point any idea is good enough.

”Your turn.” Dean grumps when he eventually walks out of the bathroom and mom looks like she wants to say something, or do something, but Dean turns away before she can and she ends up walking into the bathroom looking even sadder.

”You shouldn’t be so hard on her.” Sam says softly when mom’s out of the room.

”I’m sorry me getting raped and handling that badly affects you negatively.” Dean says snidely and Sam knows he’s just looking to pick a fight because that’s easier than dealing with this.

”We can leave.” He says calmly. ”If you want us to leave we’ll go right now. To hell with Burt.”

”Sammy, no.” Dean sighs, his shoulders hunching. ”We hunt things and we save people, that’s not gonna change. I don’t want anything to change.”

”Of course not.” Sam looks down at the floor for a moment, thinking about Burt and his leer. ”You know, we’ve hunted and killed a lot of monsters over the years and the lines have kind of greyed out on some of them, right?”

Dean turns to face him, looking pensive. ”I suppose so.”

Sam meets Dean’s eyes boldly, gaining strength from his big brother’s presence like he always does, despite their ages.

”I guess all I’m saying is that not all monsters are supernatural monsters.”

Dean stares at him for a long moment, the meaning of Sam’s words slowly sinking in and he feels like Dean is almost challenging him to not mean them but he does. He does mean that Burt is a monster and they kill monsters, they do it for a living.

”No.” Dean eventually says steadily. ”No, we kill actual monsters. Under-the-bed-monsters.”

Sam nods because he anticipated that answer and he gets it. ”Cas doesn’t have the same moral code, though.”

”What the hell are you talking about?”

Sam has thought about this as well. ”Cas raised you from perdition because the Heavenly Host had foreseen that you were the Righteous Man. Plus he’s your best friend.”

Dean’s face goes hard. ”Cas can’t know, okay?” he holds up a hand when Sam opens his mouth to protest. ”It’s fucked up enough that you and mom know. I don’t want…” he looks down. ”Let’s just finish this fucking hunt and get the hell outta Dodge.”

Sam doesn’t approve but this isn’t about him. ”Okay.” He says and smiles kindly when Dean looks up at him. ”Okay, whatever you want.”

 

*****

 

Coming back with blowtorches, some more weasel odor spray to sedate the fuckers, and crappy bee keeper suits that they got at Walmart did the trick even if it was disgusting and frankly a little scary. None of them knew if the poison covering the Basilisks’ bodies could kill them but they all knew that one bite was enough to inject enough venom to fuck up their organs. To say that they were careful was an understatement.

Well, as careful as they could be considering they were stomping about in the forest and setting snake-lizards on fire.

Taking out the nest takes a good two hours and Sam is drenched in sweat by the time it’s over. He’s also been sorely tempted to sock Burt in his grinning face the whole day and mom looked like she was about to trip him so he would fall face first into a pile of burning and squealing Basilisks but both of them honor Dean’s wish.

That Sam keeps himself between Burt and his big brother at all times is not something mom or Burt notices and not something Dean comments on.

After they’re done Dean shuts himself in their room until it’s time for Burt to go and Sam can’t blame him. He’s also happy about it because it makes what he’s about to do easier.

Was it bad of him to sneak one of the sedated Basilisks in to a zipper bag? Yes, definitely since it seems even a single one of them might be able to create a whole new nest. But honestly, as he lets mom unwittingly distract Burt, he can’t seem to care. They know how to kill them now and that’s all the matters to him.

The Basilisk is much livelier when Sam shoves it through the open crack on the window of Burt’s pickup truck but Sam gets it in there and sees it slither under the bench. Great, his job done he rounds the truck and waves a stilted goodbye to Burt.

He knows he promised Dean they wouldn’t kill Burt and he knows what he did was extremely morally wrong but hell, both he and Dean has done worse things for less. Besides, this way it’s up to fate and once in a while he thinks fate must be on their side.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Already the next day they’re back in the Bunker because, let’s be honest, Dean couldn’t get away from Burt fast enough. He still feels shame burning his cheeks when he thinks of the fact that not only Sam but also mom knows about his and Burt’s history and fucking hell, he kind of wishes he had taken up Sam’s advice and just killed the fucker. Or maybe he should have called Cas? If he had called his friend and cried like a little bitch Cas would probably have come down with all his might on Burt’s fat face before anyone even understood what happened.

Thinking about what Burt’s face might have looked like after Cas had smote him made Dean strangely satisfied and that felt like enough. Hell, he had been down to _Hell_ and been tortured for 40 fucking years, no way was he going to crack just because one guy did something disgusting to him when he was younger.

Content with that he stretched out in a chair in the Bunker’s library, a cup of coffee beside him and not whisky, a testament to how good he actually feels. He boots up his laptop and immediately scours the web for some news that seems to point their way. He thumbs his phone as he reads an article that seems like it could have to do with Kelly Kline and he’s just about to call Cas when he sees a smaller article on the same page.

There’s a picture of a totaled pickup truck and he thinks he kind of recognizes it.

”Sam?” he calls and Sam conveniently walks through the map room right then, a cup of coffee in his hand too.

”Found a new case already? Should I call mom?”

Dean swallows and hates to admit that he was actually happy that mom decided to leave them alone for a while again. Hates even more to admit that he misses his mom even when she’s standing right next to him. This whole thing with Burt has just made him so painfully aware of all the things they don’t know about each other.

”I don’t know.” He mumbles and turns his computer for his little brother to read the article and see the crashed truck. ”It’s close to Richfield, what do you think? Didn’t we get all the Basilisks?”

”I think we did.” Sam leans in and squints at the picture, reading the article quickly.

”So you don’t think it’s something to worry about?”

Sam straightens and takes a sip of his coffee. ”I really don’t.” He smiles down at Dean. ”The driver was probably just careless. It’s got nothing to do with us.”

Dean meets Sam’s eyes for a moment. ”Okay.” He eventually says and nods. ”Nothing at all.”

”Nothing at all.” Sam repeats and Dean chooses to believe him.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Sam gets his knowledge about Basilisks from the Men of Letters while I got most of mine from [Wiki](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basilisk) :)
> 
> Thank you for reading!


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